April 16th, 2012

Monday night, April 16, 2012

Not dead.

I have a theory that the pills SEEM to be having less of an effect, but judging from my typing and memory it might be me getting used to the pill, instead of it being less effective, and paying less attention to the side effects.

Tonight I'm going to test this by writing this log again, for the first time in a while, and seeing tomorrow if it's any different in the mental and sensation decay from the other times.

11:35 Liftoff

Reminder to self: Take Melatonin at 2 am as bail-out.

It has been approximately one half hour since taking the melatonin. the "effect" usually hits me within ten, but I only feel the slight sensation that starts it. This was 3 pills. 30mg. If this does nothing at all, what am I going to do?

Beginning to feel effected. I know the usual strong side of the effect lasts for 2 hours, and we're 1/4 there. I... I may need to take more at once to achieve anything. This is the way addicts die, isn't it? Hahaha.

12:11

I'm going to use my vision of the wall behind the left monitor, and my typing abilities, to gauge how much it's effecting me. Wall is still a wall. Typing still priscine.

12:21

Starting to see typos. Wall still a wall.

12:34

Moderately effected. One hour in. one hour left? I think it was up to three hours. I know it has a twelve hour half life. Wall is still a wall. Typing still fine.

12:52

Effected, I can feel the sort of sensations that indicate it. I've taken a trazodone; this will kick me into sleep mode and prep me for the 2:00 bail out, but it provides a heightened sense of the usual Ambien experience. It is my own reactions I am testing. Wall is fine..ish. Little blurry. Typing speed is rough, but fast still and without too many errors. Going to eat some peppers to agitate the stomach, will lessen the effect of the trazadon.

1:05

I have just experieced hallucinations for the first time, I heard asound, and investigated, and found that thedog Trey was ine the hall.My desk is floatig vnacl admd fo toj. The wall goes on.. forever.

These hallucinations.. inanimate things move of their own accord. I suspect some of this is due a delirious effect, where my perception of the item warps rapidly, and in turn they make it seem tomove.

The dog is staying. It was a struggle. The string Queen did not was me toallow him to live. I.. swept my hand through these buildings of stright, thought.. because they weere not really there, you see.. they're thoughts. lines of tjough

it makes ddiffficult to speak. I am not in the level of under that I seethe hallway out of a wall, and thatthe amount of unconciosness I have i ] ]]]\\\\\ different


This is dagngerous. This decline of the tyoing skills comkes from an illusion? Bodt? Internal, external/
wgateve.]. Itd\s covering thr keys

It.. is ibn,, co=iontorl.'''''''''

Peopl ebesid em.. more later.

1:26

theoretically the experience ends now. But insteaad it gave me a brief high=- not the euphoria of original runes.


SAAnd now these illusions.. the dog does not react to them, which allows to prove they are ab ukkusion s imply by watching.q Ladies of Linework code, creatures of geometric shapes, build like an organic spaceship, plethora of leaves. It glided through.

Finally, finally, the... Web. Everything was built of it. The builfingf. Thr proplr. It waws so easy to just reach out abd ull away a clunp, /I knew it wasn;t really, wondered how I was seeing this.... I crushed it in my hans and a goop with all the characrtistics of dust came outLikr artificial dry linm but cihedive

I know it's fake. Seeing my fog turn into a dark creature with deeo red holes for eyes and ears.. I reched right past it and patted the dog, and the wholr tthing ftll apart.,,

1:40

My typing has become terrible, but it is not at Ambien Auphoria Peak. The back of te monitor is simply a blink abyss. almost there. And this thing has given no evidence of turning around.

God help me.

Starting to feel the heavy sensation, loss of control, altered perception.

Typing Skill at absolute work.Wall is wall.Undure of length of ;56567hallucinations

2:18 Bail-out detaind; must havr more information. the rocking has stopped. I am go to gowndstairs one last time and get a glass o chocolate milk


2: 57
Wchirbrf smpligirf govid OIt lookjd yrdddd... I brlirvr noe tgtom yjr tsyr og frvsu to ytjr tsyrt og mmrysnolidm.





bAIL OUR SUCCESSFUL

IN RAPOD MOMMENRS o SKA;; TP OMTP S;EP




BSO; POY TRDPTY IRRSAN



tere is ni vontainmrnt all toiu can do iwaslrrp slewpp slrrp slee-p
sleeep=


11:41 Am, April 17
After Action Report

Three pills did not seem to have much of an effect upon me for up to one and a half hours. Since the effect peaks after two, this means that the pills themselves are literally not doing the job as well as they used to. I may never experience Ambien euphoria again.

Upon mixing ambien with Trazadone, mindfuckery came in hard. Typing skills rapidly decreased, but with heavy awareness of it. Saw hallucinations, sensation decay, both inset rapidly within an hour. Trazodone is what causes this, then. But.. there was no euphoria. No pleasure. There is nothing to gain from this. No inherent pleasure in bad typing, or wonky movements. The hallucinations were fascinating, but the chance of creating an incident are too high, in addition to the loss of typing and mental acuity that would follow. Trazadone cannot be mixed with Ambien. It provides heavy delusional effects as I expected from Ambien, but no euphoria.

Ambien itself provides no effects. I could feel a sensation of it affecting me, but there was no decay in typing skills or sensation acuity. Must run this test again, WITHOUT corrupting it with Ambien.

However, I will take this test as proof for now that Ambien is in fact having less of an effect upon me. Three pills could not accomplish what two used to.